“I JUST CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE COACH ……. I’M GOING TO LEAVE HIM AND I DON’T WANT TO MAKE THE TRIP TO CANADA TO GO TO THE STUDIP COUPLES RETREAT. WE ARE JUST TOO BROKEN AND NO W/E RETREAT IS GOING TO FIX THAT” she stated emphatically on the other end of our phone consultation.
I listened patiently and then gently offered this possibility to my client “Come to Couples Retreat in Ontario and allow me and my team to teach you and your partner how to love and be loved. I believe so strongly in you and Jordan and the possibility that Couples Retreat holds for you that I am holding you to your commitment to come and see what is there for you.”
SHE WAS PISSED
..to say that my client Chrissy was pissed at me would be an understatement of epic proportions. She was fighting mad. The component of her relationship dynamic she was unaware of was that her partner had a very similar conversation with me just the day before on a consult call. I told him the same thing. So they came and they experienced and they learned how to love and be loved and at the risk of fast forwarding to the end of a great story ……. They were married 3 ½ months later. While that is a great story… theREAL STORY is in what they learned about themselves and their partner at Couples Retreat and that is what I want to share with you.
The most basic and powerful of all human drives and emotions are centered on love. Some teachers even claim that true unconditional love is not an emotion at all but is an authentic state of being from deep within us. Love drives us to do and say things that we would not have said or done without love being the driving force. We climb mountains, jump in front of bullets and moving cars and are willing to look like fools for love. It is truly the most powerful force in the known Universe. We not only desire to give it we also want to receive it and receive it without strings attached or hidden agendas.
The problem is that we all have different values around love and it’s expression and what is meaningful to me is possibly not as meaningful to my partner. If you ascribe to theWholeness or Oneness theory of partnership that I do, then you realize you have gotten into relationship with someone who represents your disowned parts and therefore will definitely have a different way of giving and receiving love. That is the perfection of the Universe and how we learn and grow from our partner …… as frustrating as that is some of the time.
ONE KEY TAKEAWAY
Gary Chapman in his fabulous book “The Five Love Languages” has quantified some of the many ways we want to give and receive love. For instance my wife Shelley’s primary love language is physical touch, which explains why a touch or a hug means so much to her. In contrast my primary love language is words of affirmation so while a hug is meaningful I don’t hear “I love you” as clearly from that as I do from my wife telling me she loves me and that I am special and doing a great job.
This is just one of the many tools and exercises we share as we teach you how to love and be loved at Couples Retreat Ontario. The end result for most couples, like Jordan and Chrissy, is the creation of a whole new place of unbounded love, joy and harmony within themselves and within their relationship.
We would love to have you and your partner come and teach each other how you want to love and be loved. Just click this to find out what other couples have had to say about their experience at Retreat and when it is right for you to join us we would love to have you.
Get True Relationship Bliss
There’s an exercise at retreat that has saved marriages, my own included (I spent 14 hours with my wife going through this exercise) and we want to give you the blessing of using it in your relationships today. Your love life will blossom like you could not fathom.
- Find out EXACTLY your partner’s needs
- Find out what is important to them, yet can be sacrificed if necessary
- Learn how to grow together in a way that is authentic to you both
- Finally understand each other